World Bipolar Day takes places tomorrow, March 30th, on the birthday of Vincent Van Gogh who was posthumously diagnosed as probably having bipolar disorder. An initiative of the International Bipolar Foundation (IBPF), the Asian Network of Bipolar Disorder (ANBD) and the International Society for Bipolar Disorder (ISBD) World Bipolar Day is dedicated to raising awareness, creating solidarity of support amongst people who have bipolar disorder and advocating for resources and funding for international initiatives that support research and services for people who have bipolar disorder. For more information on World Bipolar Day consult the official website.
In addition, Crest.Bd will be hosting their AMA (Ask Me Anything) event on Reddit. This online question and answer event will start at 11 am (MST) on Tuesday, March 30th, 2021 and it will continue for forty-eight hours.
Making a donation to one of the following organizations that help people who suffer from bipolar disorder is another way to participate in the cause on World Bipolar Day.
If you have a blog or other social media presence, consider posting information and links regarding bipolar disorder and World Bipolar Day.
When I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 1995, I was embarrassed and ashamed that I had the illness and lived in fear that people would find out I had it. In the last few years, stigma has improved substantially which has allowed me to speak and write about my experience with having bipolar disorder publicly however stigma is still very real. People continue to have issues with unfair treatment by employers, family and friends simply because they have a chronic illness that is often misunderstood. World Bipolar Day is dedicated to an international explosion of awareness, advocacy and fund raising that makes me feel hopeful that people with bipolar disorder will have a better life in the future.
(Just as a little change of pace, this week I am sharing this story that was published in the Kerby News January 2018 edition.)
So, today I was sliming my way across a bike path and some young punk comes barrelling down the path on his bike and he almost hits me. Who the hell does he think he is!? Then, I looked around and discovered that some of my best friends were lying all over the path dead. All of them victims of squish-and-run perpetrators.
I realized that I was very vulnerable being on the path and I began to panic. To my horror, I spotted a family of three off in the distance that was bearing down on me. The child was riding one of those particularly scary three wheeled death machines. I drew up all my energy and willed myself to slime and slide as fast as I could. If I had hair it would not have been blowing in the breeze because I realized something else that was also horrifying. I can’t move very fast.
With all of my muscles in my body tensed I focused on one thought, “Must slime and slide faster!”
The family of three was set on a furious pace heading straight for me. They were already five blocks away now. I looked towards the edge of the path and I saw my friend Zack. He made it! Zack had made it to the other side, and he was not a victim of one of those squish-and-run criminals.
He looked at me with a determined look that only a slug can muster. It said, “You can do it Morty. Slime and slide with your heart filled with bravery and courage. Our brothers have perished but you are special Morty. You will survive!”
With newfound confidence and resolve I glided along like a speed skater going 1 mm every 5 minutes. I can do it! Thank you, Zack. I believe I can make it now and I will be victorious on this day that no one will remember because we don’t really have brains!
As time past and I grew closer to the edge, I started to feel a sense of relief. I had almost made it. Zack sat there looking so proud of me and he gave me that look that says, “You’re alright kid, you’re alright.”
Luckily, the family of three had stopped for ice cream buying me a few precious moments for me to make it to safety. I continued to put everything into my sliming clinging to the hope that I may be able to defy the odds and survive this heinous senseless slaughter of slugs.
I had just about made it off the path when I managed to just avoid being struck by the adorable family of three. I let out a huge gasp of relief. I did it. I overcame the odds. Despite having lost my brothers who had slid and slimed bravely on this day, I had survived, and I would live out the rest of my slug life with pride and as a tribute to them.
Then, I heard this beautiful dinging sound. Was the universe celebrating with me? I looked to my left and I saw another one of those squish-and-run hooligans was speeding in my direction. I realized that he was heading directly for the family that tried to kill me.
I said to myself, Justice will be served today. The squish-and-run evildoer will take out the murderous adorable family of three. As he came closer and closer the heavens again burst out in that beautiful ringing sound. The joy in the faces of the family members who were still oblivious of the dangerous carnage that was about to take place was going to make this moment even sweeter.
Just as the excitement in anticipation was starting to overwhelm me, I looked over at Zack hoping to share this glorious moment with him. Then, I heard one last ding and Zack was squished right in front of my light sensitivity eye spot. I turned to look at the family of three and they were unharmed. The squish-and-run bastard had deliberately avoided running into the adorable family because he spotted Zack and had that sick evil desire that these scumbags have to murder another slug.
My initial feelings of horror and despair gave way to my body’s fight or flight instinct and I sped across the rest of the path for the next hour. Finally, feeling a tenuous sense of safety after I had gotten off the path, I turned to look back at all of the slug corpses. My mind struggled to comprehend such a tragic and devastating sight. I looked down at Zack laying beside me, his hideously squished body forever having the indelible look of horror when one is aware of their last moment before death.
I began to weep and my whole body convulsed in grief. A few moments later, I think it was about two hours, a fire began to burn in my heart, and I was uplifted. I will not let your murder go unpunished Zack! I will avenge my slug brothers and sisters who have given their lives on this day just to check out what was on the other side of the path! And now that I think about it, I am not sure if I have sisters because we all kind of look the same but if I do I will avenge them too!
For the rest of my life all of my decisions will be tied to the cause that we slugs will one day emerge to be treated with dignity and respect and we will no longer be victims of these heinous slaughters that have plagued our kind for a really long time. I am not certain about the last part but that is my impression based on what I have witnessed today. And I proclaim that one thing is true! That a time where slugs can live without fear and oppression might happen one day!
Dr. Hong Yan–Registered Acupuncturist Master of Science Doctor of Traditional Chinese Medicine
This week’s blog is a podcast interview with Registered Acupuncturist Dr. Hong Yan. Dr. Yan discusses how acupuncture can be used to treat ADHD, stress, anxiety and depression.
Guilt can act like a weight attached to your ankle that drags darkness into every aspect of your life. It can make you feel unworthy of joy and at its worse it can cause suicidal ideation. Strong feelings of guilt can develop for people with bipolar disorder after acute episodes cause behaviour that results in things like infidelity, spending a family’s life savings or irritable rage.
It is not my place to say if people with bipolar disorder deserve forgiveness. I obviously think we do but I would never want to invalidate how people feel. I can only speak to how people with bipolar disorder can have their best life while living with guilt. A person who is paralyzed by guilt will have a hard time taking action to get well.
Peer support can be helpful. For people who do not have bipolar disorder it can be difficult for them to separate the behaviour from the identity of the individual. People who have bipolar disorder clearly understand the symptoms of bipolar disorder, so this difference is obvious to them. Plus, they are likely suffering from issues of guilt as well so they can relate to these feelings. There is a kind of magic that happens when we share our stories of suffering with people who understand.
There is nothing you can do to change what happened but making choices to decrease the chances of it happening again can help. This includes taking medication regularly, sleep hygiene, peer support, physical activity, and minimizing your consumption of alcohol. It is possible these changes could help those around you get over the pain of the incident but it does not obligate them to do so.
Family members can be supportive by finding help for themselves. Constantly reminding people who have bipolar disorder about their behaviour when they were not well is cruel. The memories are painful for us and we need to focus on the present. It is more helpful if family members can learn more about bipolar disorder and find their own support through counselling or peer support groups.
Feelings of guilt from my behaviour when I was not well have not completely dissolved for me. Even though I know it is not my fault I have bipolar disorder I still carry some guilt for things that have happened years and sometimes even decades ago. I have been fortunate that I have friends and family who have stuck by me despite the challenges of dealing with my behaviour when I am not well and my hope is that everyone is surrounded by people who value forgiveness and understanding.
Having a positive routine is crucial for people who have bipolar disorder to maintain a positive life. When Covid-19 hit Calgary and in-person contact became limited there was a good possibility that I could have become acutely ill. My routine keeps me active, connected to people and generally happy and motivated to take care of myself. I have been ok so far and I believe it is because of our ability as human beings to adapt to adverse circumstances.
I facilitate a peer support group for people with bipolar disorder at an agency called OBAD. When it was determined it was no longer safe to meet in person our meetings were cancelled temporarily. Then, our executive director, Kaj Korvela, learned how to get our meetings on zoom. At first, I was skeptical that online meetings were going to be effective, but our members have been able to find emotional connection with each other despite the change.
I am no longer able to do my volunteer job because of Covid-19. This creates a certain angst for me because regularly helping people and being in contact with the positive staff helps me stay well. My psychiatrist proposed the idea that I teach myself crochet to get by until the pandemic is over. Learning this craft has allowed me to have a positive focus for my attention and it helps me stay in the present moment.
I attend a club that teaches you how to improve your public speaking skills called Toastmasters. When we were no longer able to meet in person our club learned how to do our meetings via zoom. We have had to learn new skills like having proper lighting, maintaining eye contact with the camera, and keeping our gestures visible to our virtual audience.
None of this seems particularly impressive now. We have all become accustomed to it and we have an expectation that some activities and services should be available online. However, if someone told me in 2019 that my support group, toastmasters club and doctors appointments would all be online I would have had a hard time believing it. We have all learned to change our behaviour and expectations to get through this difficult time.
I wonder if we have not used our greatest strength to its potential. We clearly have a tremendous capacity to learn new skills to adapt to change. Problem solving techniques I am aware of are based on brainstorming and trouble shooting. What if we added, “Learning” to the list? What if we challenged ourselves to ask, “What can we learn to solve this problem?” I think it could empower us to find more thoughtful and creative solutions and improve our quality of life.
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