Month: November 2021

Having bipolar disorder can result in many losses that may destroy one’s belief in the possibility of returning to a positive life. Acute manic or depressive episodes can result in a lose of employment, relationships with a spouse, friends, and colleagues. Plus, it is common for people to lose all their money and assets.

For example, one could have a severe manic episode that results in an extreme amount of spending which can burn through people’s savings and assets. During this episode, one can become irritable which can lead to a loss of a job or relationships. If you experience psychosis such as hallucinations, paranoia or delusions of grandeur, people do not understand you are simply not well and may become fearful of you which can also lead to a loss of relationships. Perhaps, your spouse decides they cannot deal with the drama of your illness, and they leave. In just a couple of months, you can lose all your money, assets friendships, job, and spouse.

At the end of a manic episode a depressive episode will follow which includes symptoms like extreme exhaustion, body aches, poor concentration, suicidal ideation, and an inability to enjoy anything. It feels like you are a shell of a human being and it’s easy to become hopeless. However, it is possible to rebuild your life after this happens even though it seems impossible. I, and many other people who have bipolar disorder, have been able to claw their way back to a life they enjoy after these types of incidents.

My first depressive episode was the greatest amount of suffering I have ever experienced. I had lost everything. My career, marriage, all of my money and most of my friendships. My appetite was so poor I hardly ate anything, and I had to use two hands to brush my teeth. I spent several months lying in bed. This is common during depressive episodes because the fatigue is extreme, and the warmth of the bed helps ease the pain of the body aches.

To recover from this episode I made incremental improvements in my life on a daily basis. My first goal was to spend more time sitting up in bed rather than lying down the whole day. Eventually, I was able to spend more time out of bed. Then, I built on the tiny successes everyday. I would simply do my best to make the day a little bit better than the previous day. Eventually, this created a kind of moment that helped me start down the path of wellness.

This November I have been participating in Move for Movember, an initiative where I have to walk 60 km in one month for the 60 men who die by suicide every hour around the world. You can donate by clicking here. I was hesitant to participate in this campaign because last month I walked 0 km. But I used the same approach to completing the challenge that I have used to rebuild my life when bipolar takes so much from me. At first, I just did 2 km/day. Everyday, I managed to do a tiny bit and recently my walks have been longer. I have completed 56 km and there are still a few days left in November.

When bipolar disorder destroys your life the thought of ever having a life you enjoy again seems unfathomable, but it is possible. Methodically rebuilding your life one small piece at a time is the only way to get your life. Many people who have bipolar have done it so there is always hope that life will get better.