Nature’s Beauty Appreciated

This summer my friends and I went to Glenbow Ranch provincial Park just outside Cochrane, Alberta, Canada. When we got out of the car everyone immediately grabbed their phones to snap a picture of the spectacular view of the wide expanse of grassland. These type of pictures do not capture the vast beauty of this type of geography, they simply record the memory.

As we hiked through the many trails in the park, we came across a spot that was close to the river. We were soothed by the sound of the water gently passing us and we enjoyed the sight of cows coming to the opposite bank to get a drink of water. If

There was a time when a day like this would make me feel uncomfortable. Occasionally, when I have a depressive episode I am still uncomfortable with this type of activity. The problem is when you are having a depressive episode you are not able to enjoy things. The subtle beauty of nature is particularly difficult to appreciate.

If I go with my friends to a place like this and my mood is low I will not enjoy the hike. However, I still want to be with my friends. I don’t want to bring a dark cloud to the activity so I do my best to act like I am enjoying the beauty.

Everyone who has bipolar disorder has moments when they act like they are ok when they are not. We generally don’t tell people we are not well because the well meaning responses are not helpful. We can’t just change our attitude or exercise it away instantly. We are physically sick. Exercise can reduce the severity and the length of depressive episodes when they occur but it does not entirely alleviate the suffering for most people.

I am currently well enough that I can appreciate nature most days. If I am having a depressive episode I just accept it. I don’t panic. I know what is going on and I understand that it will not last forever. I will do my best to not bring the group down by acting like I am ok. If I don’t have the energy to do that then I just accept that I am doing my best and I don’ beat myself up about it.

If you have a friend who has bipolar disorder please be compassionate when they are not well. There is no need to keep asking them if they are ok or offer advise. We know what is happening and how to deal with it. Please do not be upset if the person does not seem excited about an activity. They are not well and it may have taken a great deal of effort to come spend time with you because of the fatigue depressive episodes cause. They have made the effort because you are important to them and they want to spend time with you.